Monday, June 5th 2023   |

Shavuot Sundae

Shavuot Sundae 

There once was a bully
Named Gustave McSwat,
Who terrorized his neighborhood
With a swipe of his bat.

He hated to study,
He hated his school.
He’d sit and watch TV
And think he was cool.

One day he caught sight
Of some neighborhood boys
Who were walking to synagogue
Making some noise.

“I’ll make them think twice
About coming past me.
I’ll make them pay dearly,”
McSwat said with glee.

He stood in their way
With his bat held up high.
The boys were all frightened;
They started to cry.

But the bravest of them all
Was named Samuel Lox.
He came up with a plan
That was crazy like a fox.

He said “Wait a minute.
This is not what it may seem.
Today is Shavuot,
The holiday of ice cream.”

It was known McSwat was lazy.
That was so true;
But McSwat had a sweet tooth
And this Samuel knew.

So, he told McSwat simply
That if he would stop,
He could have a new sundae
With a cherry on top.

“Just follow us to shul
And you’ll have your big treat.”
And McSwat’s tongue
Forced him to shuffle his feet.

The boys ran in first.
Then came McSwat,
Who was right behind them,
Holding onto his hat.

He thought of the ice cream
And how good it would taste.
The boys in the meantime
Moved ahead with all haste.

They moved through the sanctuary
And on through the hall.
Samuel Lox led the way,
The bravest of all.

Out past the big doors
And on past the study
Which overlooked the garden
That was untidy and muddy.

The boys knew the garden
Was in reality a trap.
If they closed the door behind them,
They’d cage that big sap.

So they rushed towards the door
And slammed it with a thud,
Leaving Gustave McSwat
All alone in the mud.

And while McSwat whimpered
And a lesson he learned.
The boys grabbed all the ice cream
Of which he had yearned.

And through the big windows
He watched them all eat
The thirty-one flavors that were
Cold and soooo sweet.

“Will you stop being a bully?”
Asked Samuel with a shout.
“Will you let us all be,
You offensive big lout?”

“If you stop being hateful,
We’ll consider you a friend
And the ice cream you desire,
You’ll get in the end.”

McSwat thought it over
And at last he agreed
To put down his bat
And to have a new creed.

They gave him a sundae
With chocolate and cherries.
He gobbled it up
And added strawberries.

And after he ate
He pronounced to them all
That he’d no longer bully
Those that were small.

And Gustave McSwat
Very true to his word
Became a good citizen
In case you’d not heard.

So the dairy of Shavuot
And in particular, ice cream,
Helped bring about change
In a man who was mean.

And he knew one thing more
That he’d say for a joke
An adage that might make
You chortle and choke.

No matter what week,
No matter what day
McSwat knew Shavuot
Was always sundae!

©2003 Alan Smason (revised 2023)

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